Menopausal Quotes and Jokes of the Day–November 2009 Edition
I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one.
I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back sometimes.
I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back sometimes.
I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles four things:
a rainy day, the elderly, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.
After Monday and Tuesday, even the Calendar says WTF!
”She is a friend of mind. She gather me, man. The pieces I am, she gather them and give them back to me in all the right order. It’s good, you know, when you got a woman who is a friend of your mind.” – — Toni Morrison
My Aunt Judy says: It was much easier being the mom in the 70′s. I WAS google. And they accepted/believed what I said (as least within earshot). And when I said that they were okay and they should just walk it off, they didn’t check on WebMD.com.
What do you get when you mix PMS with GPS?
A crazy woman who will find you
Two of the greatest qualities in life are: Patience and Wisdom. The Wisdom is knowing when to be Patient!
However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results.” British prime minister
To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.How important it is for us to recognize and celebrate our heroes and she-roes!”
–Maya Angelou,
American poet and memoirist
American poet and memoirist
Take no prisoners. 
“Remember mate, not all sharks are in the water” – The Pagemaster
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent” – Eleanor Roosevelt
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.”–Oscar Wilde,
Irish writer
Irish writer
‘No arsenal, or no weapon in the arsenals of the world, is as formidable as the will and moral courage of free men and women.’ – Ronald Reagan 
Make mine estrogen!
Cinderella is living proof that a pair of shoes can change your LIFE!I don’t have hot flashes, I have short private vacations in tropical-like conditions.
Real Women don’t have HOT FLASHES, they have POWER SURGES!
12 Things PMS Stands For: 1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweat pants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Pack My Stuff
12. Potential Murder Suspect
7 Dwarves of Menopause1. Itchy
2. Bitchy
3. Sweaty
4. Sleepy
5. Bloated
6. Forgetful
7. Psycho
Blog Note: Quotes attributed where known–apologies to those who have been omitted!
Category: menopausal quotes, Menopause, menopause joke, menopause quote
